This may seem cliché or simple, but often we do not reflect on what is happening in our lives. Our life stories are being written as we live them, but we are not always observant or patient enough to take the time to read and research it. Consider dusting off the journal on your shelf and writing your story.
Trust Someone with Your Story
Trust is required for us to open up and bear our souls and personal stories with others. To trust someone is to take a risk. The last things we often want to risk are the personal details of our lives. Yet, this is the kind of courage Jesus calls us to because until we do so, we cannot fully live in community.
Ask Others to Share Their Stories with You
The opposite of what we want to do with the people we struggle to love is to lean into relationship with them. I’ve found the first step to learning to love someone is to ask them to share his or her story with you.
Listen to Someone Else’s Story
Sometimes the difficult and awkward step is asking someone to be vulnerable with you. Listening is then the easier next step. Sitting in silence, making eye contact, and doing our best simply to absorb and hear someone else’s story is in itself an act of sacrificial love.
Remember Their Stories
When relational and staff struggles occur—and they always will—filter the conflict through story. Remember the story of the person you are in conflict with, and consider what may be going on in his or her life at the moment. This discipline will foster greater perspective, understanding and empathy.
