Dear Will and Matt,
Once boys, now men. You’re “leaving the nest”—rather thunderously, you must admit. Eighteen years ago, you turned our home upside down when we had to transform our house into an ICU for you two preemies. Soon, your departure will transform the house with deafening silence and we’ll need intensive care for our hearts.
Over the years, Dad and I sought to build a foundation of love for you. When the car was wrecked, when plates were broken, when the silence seemed surreal and the noise of an argument penetrating, we sought to love you. We sat you “on the step,” put your toys in time-out, talked through “reconciliation,” and extracted dollars from you to pay for damages. We taught you about relationships and honesty. We made you be nice to your sister (who adores you, by the way). We modeled our love for God, travel, and people in need. So with God’s grace, you’ve learned some things. We may not be the perfect family, but we are a loving one.
Change is around the corner. Perhaps you sense it. This fall, you’ll meet new friends, attend different schools, and carry more responsibility. You will manage your freedom and carve out your faith in new ways. There may be moments when change disorients you and viewpoints seem challenging. All these will become part of your story, your journey of walking with God. Remember the One who never changes. He is the center point of your turning world.
Will, you are an explorer at heart, an overcomer. The “experts” diagnosed you with a muscle condition, then declared you’d never play team sports. No one told your track or soccer coaches, because you lettered in both. You chased anything with a motor. One year you were scared to death of girls; the next, you were wowing them with your smile. I will miss your escapades.
My prayer for you, Will, is that you would cherish and protect your heart. Your leadership is compassionate and strong, but the world is rarely kind and welcoming. It will attempt to squeeze the life out of you. But you know Christ, and He is the One who can lead you through the tangles and messes. He is the true Overcomer. He gave you a heart that protects and cares for people on the fringes. He will show you the way. Don’t sweat the career choices; just trust Him.
Matt, you are a seeker of justice, an honest soul. When younger, you conversed about fairness and equality. Boy, does it evoke emotion in you! Today you are a philosopher-artist asking questions I’ve never considered. Sometimes you expose this culture and world with deserved indictments. Yet, underneath it all, you remain compassionate and kind—sometimes stymied by a crusty exterior—but always Matt. In kindergarten, when asked what you wanted to be as an adult, you always said, “Matt”! And so you are!
For you, Matt, I pray you would continue your discovery of God as the true Justice Maker. You already know Him; in fact, you have honest, priceless “discussions” with Him. Keep those up! Don’t stop wrestling! If it is justice you seek, you will find its fullest expression in Him. Interestingly enough, you will also find mercy. He loves you. He died for you so justice and love could meet.
I usually talk you to death, and I’ve done that again in this letter. If you forget everything else, remember Christ. He is all in all. I’m proud of you. Now, run out and play!
CATHY ESKEW, the Associate Pastor of Prayer and Healing Ministries at Covenant Presbyterian Church in Colorado Springs, has also worked with Young Life and Compassion International. She has an M.A. in theology with concentration in youth ministry from Whitworth College and an M. Div. from Fuller Seminary. She loves God, her family, her mother, her dog, hiking, sports, reading, trying new recipes, ministry … and apple pie.
