I have had the same passion and calling for the last twenty years. I want to spend my life directly students to live in the ways of Christ and to stand courageously for Him no matter what the cost. However, I have had to execute that calling under eight different supervisors. Some fresh out of seminary, some hanging on for retirement. Some who want to help me “get it done,” others wanting me to slow down and tend to the soul. Some that were too trusting, some not trusting enough. Some were life-of-the-party types, some were librarian-types. Through many changes, I have learned a lot about what it takes to be faithful to my calling and honoring to my supervisor. Consider this a one-stop shop to some affirmations and corrections on how to make this important relationship work.
1. Find out what matters to your supervisor. Every boss has built-in, deep-seeded values and it is by these values that you will be evaluated. Is your boss more about outreach or discipleship? Wow-factors or worship? Students or families? Numbers or stories of impact? Mission trips or retreats? You would be wise to investigate that. I have learned that bosses actually enjoy the opportunity to talk about these things.
2. Invite them into your ministry. Currently, I serve a large suburban church with lots of different ministries and students on the other side of our church campus. It is incredibly important for me to help bridge the gap for my boss (Brian) by sharing the joys and being honest about the challenges I am facing as I lead student ministry. My ministry door is always open and I invite the opportunity for Brian to see what is going on in my ministry first hand. Additionally, I compose a S.W.O.T. (Strengths, Weaknesses, Opportunities, and Treats) analysis quarterly to go through with him face to face. Even though I am in a larger ministry context today, I should have been doing all of this a long time ago when I was in charge of 15 students!
3. Minimize surprises. No boss wants to be surprised by the window you broke during a Nerf gun battle or the conflict that erupted between you and a parent or the trip budget that you miscalculated by a long shot! I encourage you to have the conversation as early as you can and be open to coaching. Getting into a regular practice of this helps your boss in leading you and (when needed) supporting you when things don’t go as you have planned.
4. Extend grace. Being a supervisor is a difficult job (especially when you supervise flip-flop wearing, always running late, belching world champion youth workers…yikes!). I encourage you to arrive at a place of seeing your supervisor as human – someone full of strengths and some weaknesses. Stop unfairly comparing them to your last supervisor or being difficult about every little thing that didn’t go your way. Walk in grace, extend grace and embody it.
I haven’t always been the best follower but after many learning moments throughout the last few decades I am enjoying a working relationship with a boss that has a different wiring, spiritual gifts, and faith story than what I have. Our differences make us a good team for being faithful in leading students to God’s heart! I pray for a similar result as you live out your calling. Take a look around and take a look within yourself…what are choices or attitude corrections that you have to make to get to a better place with your boss?
