My consequences as a former adulterer and addict were severe and nearly cost me my life. For example, I didn’t care that a condom slipped off with a street prostitute when I was 17…or when a cop followed me and took down my license plate number…or when a pimp followed me…or when I took STD tests. Yes, plural. Taking a sexually transmitted disease test is one of the most nerve-racking things I could have gone through, not to mention all the emotional scars I inflicted on myself as a result of all these encounters. The most severe was when I was contemplating suicide nine years ago. An adulterer such as myself has his own consequences and more.
You aleady may be thanking God that you’re not like me. Numerous people would say that: “I’m not like you, but I struggle in a different way.” Oh really? What way? Only looking? A wise teacher took the time to point out something 2,000 years ago:
“But I tell you that anyone who looks at a woman lustfully already has committed adultery with her in his heart. If your right eye causes you to stumble, gouge it out and throw it away. It is better for you to lose one part of your body than for your whole body to be thrown into hell. If your right hand causes you to stumble, cut it off and throw it away. It is better for you to lose one part of your body than for your whole body to go into hell” (
Did Jesus just put the adulterer and looker on the same level? Yes, He did. As I’ve said, my consequences were brutal. The point is to show you Jesus is asking the looker/luster to take the same obedient vigilance as the adulterer. You are not holy just by your non-actions; Jesus raises the standard to your eyes and thoughts. The point is not to minimize my actions, but to maximize your obedience on every level.
Jesus’ hyperbole was an exaggeration to make a clear point. The looker is not off the hook. He didn’t take time to point out the adulterer; He took the time to point out the looker is in sin just as the adulterer.
Take extreme measures to avoid sin at all costs even to the point of amputation. What does a chop entail? How does that look? My chop will be different than yours. Yet, chop you must. (Did I sound like Yoda there?)
To chop may mean:
• Not to own a smart phone or to change back to a dumb phone for a time. (I know. I had a dumb phone for six years before an upgrade.)
• Not to have cable: When I travel, I take the power strip down to the front desk. (You should see the looks on their faces when you do. It’s hilarious.)
• Go to an accountability meeting every week. (Yes, you do have time.)
• Make a call once a day to a buddy.
• Quote Scripture verses during temptation (not just read…quote).
• Delete some female Facebook contacts. (This is therapeutic actually.)
This kind of crazy, radical, chopping obedience is not optional if you have an issue with lust. It is necessary to save your life. I wish I could have taken a harder look into this passage in seminary, in church or in the hundreds of times I read it before; but I let it slide. Lust turned into porn, and then it turned into prostitution, then it nearly turned into me taking my own life. Scripture doesn’t lie when it says sin leads to death. All sin, even a lustful look, eventually leads to death. It can be the death of intimacy, death of innocence or death of a marriage.
Today, I hope I scared the pants on you! Today, I pray you choose life. Today, I pray God gives you the courage to chop. Chop you must!
Questions to ask yourself:
1. What do you need to chop out of your life?
2. How has lust hurt you?
3. What is preventing you from chopping?
4. For you, how has porn been a lie in your life? How has it been a con?
5. Who in your life will hold you up to following through on your commitment to chop?
View “Remember My Tears.”
Jared grew up in a gang town in Northern California and chose the prodigal path which ultimately was part of God’s story of redemption in his life. At first, he began a seven-year vocational ministry journey in youth ministry and social work. However, some of his inner struggles with lust continued and eventually caught up with him, and Jared was asked to resign from a large church almost a decade ago. These struggles are part of Jared’s testimony, and it is his desire to help other men who are where he has been and to convey the reality that there truly is hope. Jared has been involved in recovery programs, support groups and counseling groups for almost a decade and has a genuine passion for accountability, purity and seeing support groups planted and launched. He currently leads Pure Eyes Accountability Groups near Sacramento, California. Jared has obtained his B.A. in Theology and M.A. in Religion with a focus on Church Ministry. He has spoken nationally and internationally with X3 church and has helped write and produce short films for the organization. He currently lives in the Sacramento area with his wife of 12 years and 6-year-old son. Jared loves his guitar, mixed martial arts and wrestling with his son. Jared is working full-time as an engineering estimator and investing as much time as possible toward calling men to purity. Jared is available as a guest speaker at any of our men’s, couple’s and church service events.
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