The bottom line in youth ministry is not how many students you have participating in your youth group right now. It’s where those students will be in five or ten years.
If they have integrated their life into the church, then their youth ministry experience has been successful. If, like so many students, they leave the church, perhaps we need to look at another model for doing youth ministry.
When I was an area director for Young Life (in what now seems like another lifetime) we were excited and, frankly, a bit arrogant that the Young Life club drew 20 percent of the students from the high school we met at. But, when we looked up many of those students in college, they were not churchgoers. Had our efforts been a failure? I don’t think so. But these students, many who were committed to Young Life, had not made the move to the church.
What can make a difference? As I talk with youth ministry experts around the country, many are seeing positive results from a paradigm shift: partnering with parents in youth ministry.
Spiritual formation experts like Richard Ross, professor of student ministry at Southwestern Baptist Theological Seminary, are telling us that the percentage of Christian students who graduate from high school and then remain faithful to Christ and the church dramatically goes up if their parents actively participated in Christian education in the home. That makes sense to me.
Here are three simple decisions you can make to incorporate partnering with parents into the spiritual formation of their kids. (Of course, we must remember many students don’t have parents who will be involved. That is where mentoring and discipleship comes in.)
Help Parents Take Home What You Teach
Every youth-group function where there is biblical teaching is an opportunity for parent-student interaction. Include with your curriculum or Bible Study a “parent’s page.” Use the KISS method: Keep It Short and Simple. If the topic of your Bible study was on dating, for instance, you could cite a relevant scripture and a question about dating today. Then suggest that the parents ask their child’s thoughts on the question. This may sound intimidating to the parents at first, but if they try it, they may see their children more willing to talk than they might have expected.
Sponsor a Family Mission Trip
Lots of churches sponsor youth mission trips. Adults go along as chaperones, but are all the parents invited to go and to participate in the group activity? This might involve a great deal of sacrifice for some parents, but present the benefits that may result from the family serving together in the name of Christ.
Our church sponsored a trip to Mexico, and I took two of my girls with me on the trip. While not your usual fun-in-the-sun experience, it was incredibly bonding.
Support Family Times
At HomeWord, we are suggesting that families who want to build a spiritual legacy together spend a focused time once a week on building into each other’s spiritual growth. The problem is that many parents don’t have a clue how to relate to their kids spiritually. You have skills and resources that the parents need.
At HomeWord, we developed 52 free family devotions for our website, and it is one of the most often downloaded of our materials. Be a coach and a cheerleader for family times.Your most important impact on the lives of your students may be energizing the parents to take more leadership in the spiritual growth of their kids.
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Jim Burns is a veteran youth worker, bestselling author and founder of HomeWord (homeword.com), which helps parents and churches build God-honoring families. His “HomeWord
with Jim Burns” broadcast can be heard on 800-plus stations and on podcasts.
