Subversive. That word has been on my mind a great deal the past few years. It deepens the more I study Scripture and realize the Lord’s ways are greater than our ways. The world enslaves; Jesus frees. The world represses; Jesus liberates. The world ostracizes; Jesus embraces. The world pursues triumph; Jesus sacrifices Himself on the cross. God is subversive.
Yahweh’s deliverance of Israel from Egypt’s enslaving grip is a story of God providing a new narrative—from empire to freedom. It was not just to take off the shackles of empire slavery, but more importantly to put on a new mindset, the new narrative of I AM.1 In the same manner, Jesus’ death and resurrection provides a new narrative, one in which the church subverts the empire by embracing and welcoming all rejects who come, just as Jesus embraced the rejects of the world. God is subversive.
What does all this have to do with an article on talking to teenagers about being gay or having gay friends? I did not want to present another article debating the issue; there are plenty of informational books addressing the matter. Rather, my hope is to share what I’ve learned while walking with my students through the tough questions, and teaching them how their amazing Lord established a subversive kingdom that rocks this world. God is subversive.
Receiving Our Identity in Jesus
I loathe writing my bio. I never know what to say about myself! Usually people choose the top characteristics that make them distinct. So here goes: I’m Korean, female, left-handed, and I don’t like mushrooms. Yet above all of these characteristics the most important is that I am a child of God. I am created in His image, the Imago Dei.
It’s been a long journey to understand what this really means. Even after being called into ministry, I struggled with the reality that my value and worth are not based on my accomplishments and determination but solely on the fact that I am worthy because God deems me as such. It is all about Jesus and not at all about me.
How much of this do we teach our students and drill into their heads so they say, “OK, I get it, I get it!”? The answer is when we think we’ve done it enough, we need to do more. Reflecting on the epistles, I realize how many times Paul repeated this to the church. Why is this? Because it goes against our nature. In the words of Vizzini from The Princess Bride, it is “inconceivable!” It is subversive.
Because of its inconceivable nature, we often mistakenly fall back into a pattern of belief that behavior trumps being. We need to resist this. Research indicates students graduated from youth group without a solid understanding of what it means to be a Christian. A majority of students described their faith in terms of some form of doing—loving others, following Jesus, etc. Somewhere along the way, the message, “It’s all about Jesus, not about you,” didn’t come across. Instead, they’re graduating with a gospel of sin management.2
Now, of course our students need to walk in and bare the fruit of the Spirit, but we need to meditate on this: All imperatives in Scripture are preceded by indicatives.3 However, most of us tend to jump straight to the imperatives. We operate on the notion of “I am loved because…” What if we were to say to our students, “You are loved. The end. Period. Repeat.” This is the mind-blowing, subversive gospel and we need to allow our students to just sit in it for a while—to get all pruney in the idea of it. Paul tells us the indicative manifests itself; therefore, we are transformed from the inside out. We need to help our students, gay and straight, understand this with no confusion. They are loved. Period. Repeat. Jesus is subversive.
How Big Is Our God?
I recently watched Noah. Regardless of the issues I have with the theological fallacies in this movie, I can say one thing for sure: Aronosky did a fantastic job portraying God’s magnitude. When the waters began engulfing the world, I couldn’t help but think, “That’s our enormous God!” I try to remember this when counseling students. Before diving into any advice-giving mode, putting on my youth worker hat, or becoming the go-to person for answers, I place myself in the space of remembrance: God is great, and I am small. If I do this, then ultimately I can convey to my students the same message of how great our God is.
One key reason students leave the church after high school is because they don’t believe Jesus is bigger than their doubts, struggles and mistakes. Their thinking is, “There is no way Jesus could forgive me for that.”4 Somehow we are not sharing a big enough Jesus who did a great big thing for them.
The research from the Marin Foundation that blows my mind is that 86 percent of gay young adults grew up in the church. More mind-blowing is that although 68 percent of those who were churched said nothing ever would bring them back, but 32 percent were willing to return. After all the rejection and shaming, these young people said they would come back to their faith, and 0 percent said the church needed to tell them it was OK to be gay. ZERO.5 Thirty-two percent of gay, Jesus-loving students wanted to figure out how to walk with their Lord and Savior. What do youth pastors tell them? Do we tell them to forget it, that Jesus isn’t for them, that He’s not big enough for their problem? Is this what Jesus told the leper or the sinful woman who washed His feet? No, we emulate Jesus and tell them we will walk with them as their neighbors, because Jesus is bigger than any of their struggles. Although we aren’t certain of all the answers, we are certain of one thing. They are loved not because they stopped behaving a certain way, but because Jesus loves them. Period. Jesus is subversive.
A Place Where Everybody Knows Your Name
Research shows that students like their youth pastors a lot (YAY!), though didn’t think their youth pastor knew them or allowed a space to share their deepest, darkest questions. I’ve come to realize students who care about their faith in Christ at some point will ask hard questions. I also realize it’s not about providing the right regurgitate-able Bible quiz answers, but rather about walking with students, giving them tools to ask the right questions, and to be comfortable in the unknown, to trust that God is able to handle it all.
Unfortunately this often feels extremely unsafe. It seems easier and safer when we emphasize the imperatives, as if we’ve accomplished something. Focusing on the indicatives as the basis of the imperatives is counterintuitive. Some of us may get fired if we do this because it appears irresponsible and dangerous to others. Then again, Jesus was crucified for His indicatives!
I recently watched an “Oprah” episode featuring Jacqui, a beautiful young college sophomore who was going out with her two girlfriends. While waiting at a stoplight, a junior in high school slammed into their car because he was driving home drunk from a party. Two of the girls died, and Jacqui suffered from fourth degree burns. It was beyond heart wrenching. Every day, Jacqui’s father dressed her because her fingers were melted. He put drops in her eyes every 30 minutes because she no longer had eyelids. I was an emotional wreck. The boy was serving time for involuntary manslaughter, and his mother was on the show to apologize on his behalf. She barely could get through her words. It was painful watching her guilt and torment. When Oprah asked what she learned and would like to share with other parents, the mother confessed how she raised her son in a black-and-white world but warned parents how all kids might drink despite knowing they shouldn’t. She shared that if she could go back, she would tell her son that although she disapproved of his drinking, if he were to find himself in a dangerous situation to call home, that he wouldn’t get grounded, that they would talk and work it out, and that walking with her son through the rules was better than being strict6. I was shouting at the TV: “Yes, yes, and yes!”
As pastors, we have failed at offering a safe place for doubt, questions and struggles. How can we provide a space so our gay students can journey with Jesus? How do we create a place for them when they are rejected or forced to be something other than what they are? They should be able to come to church and breathe a sigh of relief because they’re able to exist as children of God. Simply telling our struggling students, “It’s a sin. Stay away. Stop being gay, and tell your gay friends it’s a sin,” is not good enough. Kids desire for us to walk with them safely and show them a Lord and Savior who isn’t afraid. Jesus is subversive.
Jesus Brings a Subversive Kingdom
Scripture tells us that all of creation has looked forward to “the glorious freedom from death and decay” (
When the Pharisees told the rejects of the world they would be loved only if (fill in the blank), Jesus preached they were loved no matter what. The world’s narrative is that of the empire, but Jesus’ narrative is that of His love. How will we as pastors follow in Jesus’ subversive footsteps and share His life-saving gospel message to our gay students? How will we help our students follow in Jesus’ subversive footsteps when being a neighbor to their gay friend?
Ultimately we need to remember the words of Billy Graham and trust it’s the Holy Spirit’s job to convict, God’s job to judge, and our job to love. Imagine the transformation in our students’ lives as they encounter and walk with a subversive Savior. Imagine the impact our students will make in the world as they shine forth the subversive message of their Savior. As pastors, we must preach the gospel of Jesus continually to the ragamuffins of our society: the lepers, outcasts, poor and weak. Jesus calls us to be subversive.
References
1 Daniel G. Groody, Globalization, Spirituality and Justice: Navigating the Path to Peace (Maryknoll: Orbis Books, 2013), 33-35.
2 Kara E. Powell, Brad M. Griffin and Cheryl A. Crawford. Sticky Faith, Youth Worker Edition: Practical Ideas to Nurture Long-Term Faith in Teenagers (Grand Rapids: Zondervan/Youth Specialties, 2011), 33-39.
3 David Lomas, The Truest Thing About You (Colorado Springs: David C. Cook, 2014), 132-149.
4 Powell, et al.
5 Irene M. Cho, “I Think I’m Gay,” The Journal of Student Ministries Magazine 4, no. 3 (2009).
6 “Oprah“
Irene Cho holds an M.Div. with an emphasis in pastoral and general ministries from Talbot Theological Seminary and a bachelor’s in Christian education from Biola University. She is a Ph.D. student in Fuller’s School of Intercultural Studies, where she’s the point person for the Urban Youth Ministry Certificate Program, event planning, and FYI systems overall. Cho has served more than 20 years in youth ministry, speaks nationally, has written various curricula, and consults for many youth ministries. She’s passionate about misfits and bringing the gospel to those who often fall through the cracks. Cho enjoys great books, movies and TV shows; hanging out with friends and former students; and getting some sleep.
