In my first column for YouthWorker Journal, I want to talk about some of the basic goals we seek with the men and women we serve in the urban context. This takes me to my son Samuel.
Samuel is too young for heavy speeches about what it means to be a person who “seek[s] the peace of the city,” as the prophet Jeremiah says (
At Harambee, I regularly encounter young people who need help defining and pursuing basic life goals. I often find myself in quasi-parental roles with these youth. Unlike my son, many of these urban kids live in foster care, with relatives or a single parent. Though they may receive love, encouragement and material support from their families, they often don’t get instruction about what to shoot for in life—for laying out goals to work toward.
This is what I would tell them: To be an effective man or woman of God, you must be a blessing to others—the people around you and in your city. Lay out goals, shoot for something good. Here are five ways to do that.
1) Be a Member of a Church
Membership in a church isn’t some occasional association. It’s involvement and commitment. A young man once told me he was attending a megachurch across town. As it turned out, he visited the church once to meet a girl. She wasn’t there, so he left. That is not membership. If the pastor or other members recognize you and affirm your participation, that’s membership.
2) Attend, Support and Invest in Your Church and Community Ministries
Give money to the church where you attend. Your whole attitude will change when you have skin in the game. Volunteer every week or month–none of this showing up at Christmas with a Hummer full of toys, like athletes and rappers who take photos of their “giving back,” then go to the next media event. Carry some weight.
Attend church at least once a week besides Sunday. Church membership is about life together with a group of Christ-followers. Life happens seven days a week, not an hour or two when you would prefer to be sleeping.
3) Get a Full-time Job
Many in urban areas simply are not convinced full-time employment is a big deal. When you work full time, you raise your standards. You work hard for your little pay, and you will begin to think others should work hard, too. That alone will bring positive change in the ’hood.
4) Keep it in the Family
If you have a baby, it’s within marriage. This one’s sensitive because there are so many children born outside of marriage these days. In my ’hood, no one thinks twice or feels shame about it. I also don’t want to judge good people who made mistakes earlier in life, but somebody has to say it: The goal is to keep it in your pants until you have created the space, with your spouse, in which a young life can thrive.
5) Be Involved in Civic Life
Vote. Every time. Serve on a city commission or church committee, volunteer with the city or commit to a public school. Critical change happens in these civic institutions, not just in our churches.
That’s the basic road map I try to pass on to my children and the urban youth I serve. In the future I will look forward to sharing more of my ministry principles and hearing from you about yours.
