Losing Control & Liking It
Tim Sanford, M.A.
Tyndale House, January 2009, 192 pp., $13.99
www.tyndale.com
A dad’s job isn’t to control, but to validate his children. A mom’s job is nurturing her children–filling them with life. This is the basis of Losing Control & Liking It.
Practical and encouraging, Sanford explains how parents subtlety and overtly control their teens, what control does to teenagers and practical steps to redirect one’s tendencies and stop power struggles. Numerous real-life examples from Sanford’s therapy practice put reality on display for the reader. He draws lines between healthy and unhealthy boundaries with the terms: Holders–who understand what they’re responsible for and take responsibility for it; Tossers–see what they should control but say, “I don’t take responsibility for it”; Grabbers–see what they cannot control but still take responsibility; and Folders–see what they cannot control and don’t take responsibility. Conversations are provided to show examples of all these.
