Years ago when statistics began pointing to the high drop-out rate of young adults in the church, I had an easy solution — eliminate the youth minister position from the church staff. In essence, fire me. While church leaders were trying to come up with solutions or programs to address the situation, I knew the problem was right there in front of us. Through the years, our youth groups had increasingly gravitated away from the church. Somewhere along the way, youth groups went from simple Sunday School or Bible studies to full-blown independent programs. We have our own buildings or floors; we have separate staff and volunteers; we have our own retreats and mission trips; we have fun parties, separate worship services and youth bands. In our efforts to reach teens and keep them in the church, we accidently took them out of the church.

After years of being catered to in a youth ministry, the inevitable happens — teenagers grow up and move on. (We kick them out). Suddenly church looks a lot different as a young adult than it did as a youth. Instead of having so many options and great volunteers to ensure everyone is intentionally cared for, former youth are suddenly ushered into a worship service with stuffy music and a message on tithing. Sunday School becomes something that appears to be thrown together in an attempt to look as if someone cares. No longer are they the center of attention; they are just part of the herd. Sure, some churches try to replicate elements of youth ministry for young adults, but these usually are just watered-down versions of youth group. Feeling alienated and unsure of their purpose, the sheep begin to go astray.

Suggesting something as radical as eliminating youth ministers may get you a look or two, but no one really believes we should do it, especially when a youth minister says it; but I am serious…at least for the most part. What I actually mean is that we should eliminate the ideals, motives and duties we have come to expect of the typical youth minister. Indeed, there are other contributing factors to the decline of young adults in the church, but if we look back at the past couple of decades, it is easy to see where we made our mistakes. Most youth workers deal solely in the here and now. What are the coolest trends? What is going to get the most teenagers to our events? How can we keep the pastor off our back? By dealing only in the now, we have forgotten how quickly our youth become young adults. When we focus so much of our attention on getting them through the rough teenage years, we often miss opportunities to show them what it looks like to live out their faith for a lifetime.

See the problem? Youth groups do not resemble church. In our attempts to keep church cool, relevant and fun for the youth, we have created an entirely new church — one from which they are excommunicated when they go to college. It’s time to change the way we minister to youth.

Of course I am not saying youth groups should take on the model most churches use. Many of those models are failing, as well; but maybe we can help each other. Instead of keeping youth in far-off places in the church building or even in an entirely separate building, perhaps we should start showing up to things. If the church is a body, it is time to give the body a little youthful exuberance.

1. Youth on committees: One of the best ways to help youth grow up and stay in the church is to have them participate in a worship service. Don’t stop there! The real decisions happen the rest of the week. Begin by seeking open spots for youth representation on all major committees from worship teams to leadership committees. This will serve many purposes. If our goal is to continue to reach young people and young families, having a younger voice at the table can bring a balance. Also, for things such as worship planning, having a youth there will remind adults that not only gray hairs exist in the audience. For youth, it can help them see how and why decisions are made. They begin to understand the church on a broader scale and that there are many people needing to be reached, not just teenagers. Finally, it will give them courage to show up as a young adult and be a part of what is happening at the church. They know their presence does make a difference.

2. Bring on the boring old folks and the weirdos: Many youth workers (myself included) prefer to have cool adult volunteers, but not too many of them. Sometimes adults seem to get in the way, even the cool ones. So, while it may seem important to keep youth feeling comfortable by surrounding them mostly by their peers, what does this end up making the church look like? A place where everyone looks like me and has the same problems I do. Teenagers already deal with enough narcissistic, myopic self-indulgence, no need to continue that trend. Making sure your youth volunteers are large in number, look diverse, sound diverse and are diverse is essential. The body is made up of many parts. If we want our current teenagers to embrace the church as young adults, they need to feel at ease around an assortment of adults. Ask the busy father of four young kids, the lonely widow, the quiet studious adult and the person who sings extra loud in the front row. You get the idea. Do whatever it takes to make your youth recognize the church as a diverse body of believers. Later when they return as young adults, the church will not look like a group of really old, disconnected adults; it will look like fellow pilgrims on a journey, just like them.

3. Check your ego at the door: Let’s be honest. For most of us, our youth groups look like us. If we are energetic and off-the-wall types, our youth groups looks like an A.D.D. awareness poster. If we are overly organized or too deliberate, our youth groups look like a group of anal monks. If we are loud, Bible preaching types, our youth groups look like a leftover cast from an Old Testament film. Get the point? Helping our youth groups become diverse and accept diversity potentially could help them as young adults. Remember, your reflection may look nice in the mirror, but your youth group doesn’t have to look, act or think as you do.

Eliminating youth ministers may sound a little harsh. Maybe it is. Especially when the issue of young adults leaving the church is a complicated challenge. However, if we want youth in our churches to show up again after they have entered young adulthood, we must look deep inside our ministries. Are we nurturing future disciples of Jesus Christ, or are we just trying to keep our program filled with teenagers until they go off to college?