Nearly 15 years ago, I plunged into the world of youth ministry with great boundaries, strong spiritual disciplines, and a desire to pour into others. I was living the dream of implementing all that I had learned from others. New volunteers were stepping up, and students were excited about the direction we were headed. Smiles all around, lessons that were connecting, and a happy senior pastor—who could ask for more? I was feeling God’s favor and seeing changes in the lives of students as they walked in the way of Jesus.
Fact: It didn’t last.
To be honest, I am not sure how it all unfolded. Add more expectations from church leaders, marriage, more families and students, some perfectionist and competitive tendencies within me, a miscarriage (or two), the ups and downs of attendance, confusion around my calling, church conflict…There I was. I had become everything I was determined not to be. I had emptied my spiritual reserves. My schedule was fast, and my soul was dry. The passion that used to move inside me as an unstoppable current was rung out. Time with God was absent from my routine. I had become a shallow, hurried, robotic youth worker. However, I was determined I would not and could not stay there. At the intersection of passion and burnout, I made an important shift into the practice of soul journaling.
The Mindset of a Soul Journaler
Soul journaling simply is reflecting and recording the work of God in our lives. It isn’t a one-time experience. The richness of soul journaling surfaces through time (similar to, perhaps simultaneous with, the story God is writing in our lives). It’s not about being self-focused. In soul journaling, we are in our rightful place: being small in the shadow of the Most High in all our mess, gifts, confusion and joys. More than just a habit or a spiritual discipline, soul journaling is a deep invitation:
To be simple: Approaching time with God shouldn’t be complicated with human expectations. If our relationship with God is truly fatherly, I imagine He would invite us to drop our doing and simply be. Soul journaling involves a simple view of ourselves, God, our lives and the Bible. No fanfare, no special tools. I often find myself surrounded by Christians who plow through the Bible once each year. With a simple view of myself and the Bible, I am free to read less of God’s Word.
To be authentic: At God’s feet, I am free to be me. It has been my experience with other spiritual practices that I am forcing myself to a place of intimacy with the Father. However, I have learned the more I force an experience with God, the less I experience Him. For example, in prayer there is very little I can do to force God to show up. I will call on Him, I will make myself available and be present to Him. That is the authenticity I experience in soul journaling. I am welcomed in His presence, and He is on the move within me. As I grab the Bible and a journal, I am eager to drop our ministry, my platform and my title that so easily prop up my security and soothe my rawness. In exchange, I am free to be me—the totally unfiltered me.
To be disciplined: In soul journaling, I am convinced that expression must be matched with discipline. If soul journaling were only expression and pouring out my heart for the sake of spirituality and emotions, it would result in little or no spiritual growth. If it were all discipline, it would be soul-less, rigid and selfish. In my early days of soul journaling, I had a hard time with this balance. My mind immediately concluded that spiritual practices had to be all emotion-based. I battled with this until I came to a place of owning both. There is a rhythm to soul journaling that provides freedom for expression of my heart. This understanding broke open my time with God and motivated me to push forward in what I had discovered.
Getting Started
Soul journaling as a practice can take myriad different directions. In some ways, the practice itself is as unique as participant. At the same time, I believe there are some components that will help as you begin your own rhythm.
First, I start most soul journaling times in the Bible by recording a word or phrase in which I sense the Lord’s activity. Only a few days ago as I was reading through Ruth, I was reminded of the bond between Ruth and Naomi. It challenged me to ask basic questions: Do I have “go where you go, stay where you stay” type relationships such as the one cited in
Second, I write something. It could be be something I find interesting about the verse, or sometimes I choose to write about where I see God working (or not working) in and around me. Marriage, finances, ministry, friendships, extended family, co-workers, future, whatever—I know God is active on all these fronts. While I am running, I sometimes am introduced to a new song I can’t get out of my head. I take the opportunity to journal about that, as well. Sometimes a journal page is a blank canvas for composing songs, sketching God’s activity or writing poetry. If connection to the Lord is our aim, the space provides freedom to discover that connection.
Finally, I conclude with a prayer of surrender. At times, my prayers reflect the psalms; other times they sound more ecclesiastical. In all of this, I am not confined. Sometimes my whole entry is Scripture; sometimes it is all prayer; sometimes it is a complete rant; and it is all good. Again, it is reflecting and recording the activity of God, rants and all. The prayer of surrender could be as short as a sentence, but that sentence can frame the entire entry.
Soul journaling reminds me of God’s continual call to the Israelites in the Old Testament…remember and return. Soul journaling helps me remember what He has done in my life and causes me continually to return to Him. On occasion, I find myself looking back at several years to encounter again the faithfulness of God in my life. This is the beauty of long-term, slow and steady, reflection and recording. Through soul journaling, we actively are recording His workings in and around us one simple truth and conflict at a time—in seasons when we are experiencing the favor of God in relationships, ministry or finances—when we are dreaming of a dramatic resignation and want to leave it all behind. In so many instances, we likely have recorded those emotions and have seen God working with us through those times. Soul journaling helps me to track this activity and that along the way, through the struggle, I have relied on the Lord. When I have, He has shown up and guided me regardless of the conditions.
God is writing a story through our lives, and we must find His work within the story. What story is God writing in you? Begin recording it today.
