In Him and through faith in Him we may approach God with freedom and confidence (
What is it in us that makes us lack confidence? What is inside of us that makes us so awkward sometimes? We have trouble speaking with people or speaking out loud. We know there’s this emptiness phenomenon, but we neither can describe it nor would we want to describe; we don’t feel there’s a reason to do that. We may have success in something (e.g., sports, school, relationships) but that successful feeling helps cover up the unsuccessful feeling that’s there most of the time. This thing is a part of you, and it’s not going anywhere, so you learn to live with it.
I remember when I was in high school. I didn’t have a ton of confidence. There were guys with a ton of confidence around me They knew the world, understood how it worked and were ready to take on whatever it dished out to them. The girls always liked those guys. Have you ever been to a dance and seen someone who dances terribly but has a great time and people love the person anyway? Confidence is a very attractive quality.
I became a Christian when I was 16 years old. Before then, I was extremely nervous with girls and the thought of asking them out on dates. After I became a Christian, I gained a lot of confidence. I got a girlfriend for the first time in a long time; things began to look up. My treasure and focus in life became Christ. I knew my identity for the first time. I knew who I was. I heard some friends after church one night talking about me. They said we all have issues and troubles in life, but that I was like Steady Eddie—I just kept going. It was true. I had troubles the same as anyone else, but generally I was moving forward.
Before then, I never knew the value that was me. Have you ever seen She’s Out of My League, where at the end the guy realizes he’s not subpar but a 10 and his friends had been lowering his expectations on women? He had been settling. Don’t do that. We’re all 10s. Don’t get stuck on what you’re not, but realize what and who you are.
Nelson Mandela gets credit for the following quote, but he was quoting someone else, an author named Marianne Williamson. You’ve heard part of it from the end of Coach Carter, the movie with Samuel Jackson:
“Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won’t feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It’s not just in some of us; it’s in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.”
“In Him was life, and that life was the light of men. The light shines in the darkness, but the darkness has not understood it” (
I cannot make you gain confidence. If you want to ask that girl out, I can’t help you, Bro. However, I can tell you this: They want you to ask! Even if they don’t like you, and even if they don’t say yes, they will be flattered. You can’t live your life wondering, “What if?” Live your life without regrets. Trust God. Trust that what God started in Jesus is coming to be fulfilled in your heart and your life. Pray for yearning, pray for passion and desire. Begin to take action where you haven’t in the past. Don’t play small or play down; let the light shine.
My son, who is 2 years old, shines like crazy. His smile lights up the planet. It’s incredible. His shining blows through my cover and exposes that darkness in me. I have to give it to God. You are meant to shine that way, too! What Satan may have taken from you and left a void—give it back to God. Watch it change. Then you’ll unconsciously be shining your light onto those around you who need it, who need liberation themselves.
This is the age, today is the day, to honor God with all that you are. Sometimes you bring to God only the good things. You show God all the clean garments and pretty things and think you’re hiding the dirty and uglier stuff from Him. You have to bring it all to God—all of it—every last bit. Then things change. Confidence—it’s a very attractive quality.
