The End of Sexual Identity: Why Sex Is Too Important to Define Who We Are
By Jenell Williams Paris
InterVarsity Press, 2011, 180 pp., $15

Have you received that call from the concerned parent regarding a son or daughter’s sexual choices? Maybe you have met with a student, and the topic of their sexuality surfaces. What were your thoughts in that moment? How equipped do you feel to address with dignity all the things, the emotions, the hurt, confusion, fear and glory that swirl around our sexuality.

Add on a bunch of emotion when the topic specifically has to do with same-sex attraction, gender issues and same-sex pornography. Just curious, what do you say? What do you offer the struggling parent or the embarrassed, confused student? Have you developed a theology for situations such as this, a biblical understanding?

When I first saw Jenell Williams Paris’ book and read the title, I really wanted it to be great. I feel there are not enough thoughtful books on this subject, and by thoughtful I mean well-researched, compassionately written and maybe even set a bit against the trend. Again, I go back to my original questions: What do you say to the parent or student? What are your core beliefs? What is your agenda? What help do you offer? After all, we are in the helping business.

This is a great book. Paris approaches the topic of sexuality from the perspective of a wife, mother, conservative Christian and scholar. She is an anthropologist, and as such she says this about her chosen field:

“Cultural anthropology is the description and interpretation of similarities and differences in human cultures. Anthropologists use library research, laboratory work and detached observation as needed, but the heart of our approach is participant-observation, full immersion in other ways of life. This is what drew me to anthropology—it’s incarnational nature. Anthropologists learn by deeply involving themselves in the everyday lives of the people they are studying, sometimes for several years at a time.”

Paris uses world history, culture, story, Scripture, thorough research and personal opinion to educate and challenge us to grow in our biblical worldview on sexuality, our compassion for individual differences and struggles, and encourages us to cease using what she calls a “sexual identity framework” to define who we are. She does all this and yet calls us to sexual holiness and repentance. I do hope you will read it!